Life in bullet points: 5w1d

• First, I saw this awesome test on Earlypregnancytests.com. Instead of drawing blood for repeat betas, if one is relaxed enough, they could use this: It can detect Beta HCG levels at 25,100,500,2000 and 10000 IU. (!!!) Should keep one sane until their 6 week ultrasounds, without getting jabbed repeatedly. If you wanted to detect to 20000 IU, you theoretically could as well (collect urine, dilute with  exactly equal amount of water) and test. That is the scientist in me talking. Slinking away now.

• I'm now waiting for my toxoplasmosis IgG/IgM test. Since I have a cat, I want to be sure I have prior immunity to Toxoplasma gondii, a nasty parasite can live in your cat and be shed in the poop. Has the potential to cause havoc in pregnancy. According to one source, around 30-50% of the world's population has had prior contact with this parasite and is protected by IgG antibodies against it. Infection is asymptomatic and usually causes no issues (though a recent study linked T.gondii in the brain (ack!) to increased suicide risk), but can be potentially deadly if contracted during a pregnancy, especially the first trimester.

• Sadly, it now looks that I'd have to stay here (in the US) till the end of my first trimester. I'm doing this so in case any of my screenings (nuchal translucency or AFP) raise flags, then I can get tested with the Sequenom Tri21plus test, which is an alternative for amniocentesis/CVS for the detection of Trisomies 13, 18 and 21.  Unlike amniocentesis or CVS which are needle biopsies into your uterus, this is just a blood test. Unfortunately, this would not be available in upon moving to India. The thought of getting an amniocentesis there (or in most places here as well) makes my blood run cold. Amniocentesis is a test where you should have only the best of the best, who have done it like 5000 times before, preferably perform. One of the worst horror stories I've heard is about a woman who had an amnio done, at Scripps (allegedly). They did not disinfect the skin properly and contaminated the sac with skin bacteria. She lost both her babies within hours. So be very, very careful about where you have an amniocentesis or a CVS done, if it comes down to that. Its worth traveling and paying out of pocket, to be able to go to somebody with a good reputation.

• Its going to be nerve wracking being here, sans family, ultrasound to ultrasound, if this pregnancy keeps progressing, which I hope and pray it will. I can anticipate being kind of a wreck during my 'danger period' of around 8-9 weeks where both my previous pregnancies ended. I'm really glad I have you all to virtually hold my hand through this.

Confessions of a POAS addict

Be warned- this is an orgy of TMI.


The 2ww has the potential to be biggest, most evil tease ever.  How many people out there have had 'symptoms' up the wazoo only to be visited by Aunt Flo in a few days? The last time I went through this, I  was perfectly fine till 3 days past ovulation, when I started feeling chills, nausea, sore boobs and quite a bit of CM. My symptoms were kind enough to work in concert, I'd poke at my chest to make sure it was till sore and the nausea would come up- bliss. If you ever catch a woman playing with her own chest- she is probably not a nut or a pervert, she is just in the 2ww. All of these 'symptoms' turned me into a gibbering google junkie and drove me to start testing from 5 DPO!! Nobody, not even Octumom, could have had a positive that early. Thankfully, I had purchased super cheap but good sticks off the internet which allowed me to indulge in my twice daily ritual with no dent in my wallet.  By the morning of the 10th day, I'd lost all hope but I still kept going only to be caught completely by surprise by a clear BFP that very evening.

This time- I have some of the 'symptoms' back- I've got the boobs that feel like they are going to burst out of their skin and Torquemada came back from hell just to create some very painful clamps for them, I've got the crazy and plentiful CM, I've even got the nausea. I'm missing the 'implantation' cramps, or atleast the biggest wave is due tomorrow and I'll be pretty darned unhappy if they don't show. I've been POASing exactly like the last time and nothing yet- its only 7DPO and I'm be terrified if I actually got a BFP this early.

I still know that despite all of this, its possible this cycle may not have worked. Its a very unusual one for me and clearly estrogen and progesterone are high and having  a party inside of me but that does not necessarily translate to pregnancy. If  its a BFN, it just translates to a very unusual cycle (not good, I like the fact that my reproductive system is normally as as predictable and efficient as a German-designed instrument), but what can ya do.

All I can say is, thank god for sensitive internet cheapies; I've got 50 of them in my bathroom and I'm going through them rapidly!